Friday, May 20, 2011

i'm moving my blog!

here's where i'll be setting up camp from now on:

http://coldcoffeethinking.wordpress.com/

Monday, May 9, 2011

Get a different ruler.

How do you measure success?

In order to measure anything you've got to have a ruler, a yardstick, a measuring cup, or some form of tool designed to represent a standard and then evaluate and compare.  So, for the sake of this analogy, let's just stick with a ruler.  Where do we get that ruler?  Well, you just go down to the store and buy one, right?  It's the supply & demand principle, and our culture has obsessively demanded success to gratify our prideful hearts.  So, naturally, there has been an endless and evolving supply of rulers to measure and evaluate what success looks like in our world today.  It may be which celebrity you look like, or the speed of your car, or the brand on your clothes, or the image conveyed by your Facebook profile picture, or the friends you associate with, or the title you hold at work.  We assign meaning to these descriptions of us, and we're constantly glancing back and forth between ourselves and the image our world esteems as successful.  And our culture becomes the ruler, and it rules over us.  The more often we measure the more quickly we become possessed by the pursuit of success, significance and gratification.  Or, to put it more bluntly, we become obsessed with ourselves.  Unfortunately, we have a tendancy to buy what we're being sold, and we as Christians are not always discerning.  We too often wish to flirt and learn from society, and we become deceived and conformed to their image.  Our culture is constantly putting out a new line of rulers that often look and sound downright biblical.  There's where it becomes dangerous, even deadly.

We often measure success as Christians or as a church with the same ruler(s) our culture is using.

It may be an ignorant mistake, and most often we mean well and even think it's honoring to God.  We hear spiritual leaders urging us on to "tackle great obstacles", "go get our world for God", "dream big dreams", "cast a bigger vision", and so on and so forth.  It sounds inspiring, it sounds positive, and it sounds exactly like the faith we're told we're supposed to have.  Shouldn't we go all in and do great things for God?  Shouldn't we pray that God raises up a generation of devoted followers that will rock the world with the gospel?  The leaders championing that cause wield a strong influence on Christianity in America (especially among young people).  But what if some of these leaders unknowingly ripped a page out of the latest corporate leadership magazines because someone they trusted had substituted it for the Word of God?

I'm a part of this generation that grew up dreaming about accomplishing awesome things for the Lord.  And I've also snubbed my nose at the "dead" spirituality of my parents' generation.  What made their spirituality "dead"?  Well, it just wasn't successful!  I mean, look at the numbers, they don't lie!  Look at all the pastors who were simply content to stay at that little podunk church going nowhere.  They're not attracting new people, they're outreach events are lame, and their current attempts at becoming more contemporary are embarrassing.  No, I want to be a part of a great work of God!  I want to be a part of church where the masses are swarming in and being touched with our message.  I want to be able to brag...er, I mean share...well, no...I guess I do want to be able to brag about what God is doing in and through me and my church.  I want to know that God is using me mightily and that we are successful!

But what if God doesn't use me like that?

What if I'm a part of a church that's not bringing them in by the hundreds and rocking the house and seeing dozens come to Christ each week?  What if my week is spent mowing an old lady's yard, and that lady is certainly not going to be someone influential in the community?  What if our church's worship service is attended by the same few each week?  What if our old-school door-to-door methods of outreach don't turn out any converts or baptisms?  What if we keep spinning our wheels and end up stuck in the same place as a church for the next 20 years without seeing any noticeable growth other than a few of the kids growing up to replace the elderly?

Will I be OK with that?

Well, I guess I'd better stop asking my culture, because I know what answer they'd give me.  But what would God say?  That's probably the better question we should have started with from the beginning:


How does God measure success?


It seems to come down to a simple characteristic He's looking for:  FAITHFULNESS.  Sure, I know He counted the servants' talents when He returned to see if they'd brought in an increase, but was it a certain number He was after?  Or was He looking to see if they had been faithful?  We are assured that true believers will produce fruit, but I'm afraid we may often project our own misconceptions about the nature of the fruit and judge an individual from the outside.  Self-evaluation must boil down to that question: am I being faithful to God?  And only the mirror of His Word will reflect an accurate answer.

Hey, if God allows you to be a part of a church that has the privilege and joy of being harvesters, then rejoice!  Give the glory to the One who causes all things to grow.  Stay faithful.  And if God in His sovereign wisdom uses you for years to be a planter or one who waters but never sees much of the harvest, then rejoice!  Give the glory to the One who causes all things to grow.  Stay faithful.

I'm throwing out the ruler my culture sold me.  It's not about me looking successful, that is simply the ugly outworking of my pride.  I've got a different Ruler, and I'm asking Him for strength today to walk in His Spirit, that someday I might hear Him say to me, "Well done, good and faithful servant."

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Are you prepared for Easter?

We're about to be bombarded again with another commercialized holiday season.  Easter is approaching, and the shopping centers promise not to disappoint.  Already the other day I saw a big banner announcing a store's emphasis, "Bunnylicious" (sounded like a really cheesy Fergie knock-off on an already cheesy song).  There's sure to be mounds of chocolate bunnies, gooey peeps, egg-coloring kits (everything from camouflage to tie dye to stickers), baskets and every kind of trinket they know we'll stuff in them.  The disappointment is that it's all consumer driven.  That means me.  I buy this stuff.  I add to the spring buzz that's no doubt meant to drown out the religious overtones of Easter.  What's crazy is that it doesn't just stop with Target or Wal-Mart.  I'm sure Christian bookstores make a killing during this season.

But just hold on...

I'm not saying that any of this is inherently wrong (other than the Fergie reference).  It's difficult to make a legitimate argument that the Easter bunny is the spawn of Satan, and it's perfectly fine for you to build your child an Easter basket and hunt for eggs.  And who's not looking forward to ripping into a pack of peeps?!

All this commercialized hype can be a lot of fun and add positive memories to an already celebratory season with friends and family.  So color your eggs, down some chocolate, take family pictures in your dresses and ties...but sanctify the real reason for celebration.  Set it apart.  Don't cheapen the cross and the empty tomb by mixing it in with superfluous holiday consumption.

I know you've heard this kind of message a thousand times before (at least every time Christmas & Easter come rolling around again), but let's talk some strategy here.  Go ahead, huddle up!  Lean in and listen up!  I realize that as Christians we should be celebrating the Resurrection every Sunday, but do you recognize the opportunities this holiday season can provide for us?  At some point this Easter season, the people in our communities are going to hear or see some reference to Jesus.  Religious people, religious sub-cultures and churches thrive on the exposure they receive around this holiday, and our culture may be more sensitive, more inquisitive or at least more aware of what happens in churches and what's being taught.

But the question is, Will they hear the gospel?


So here's where I have to ask you, Are you prepared for Easter?  Are you prepared to take advantage of opportunities that may come up in casual conversation that would allow you to speak the truth about our Creator and Redeemer? (1 Peter 3:15)

Here's a hint: if you know and delight in Christ then you can confidently answer, Yes!  Easter Sunday is not the reason we celebrate.  We celebrate because we know Jesus.  Our joy is in Him alone.  We can marvel in the truth that Jesus + nothing = everything.  Jesus knew how bad our condition was, and He fixed it with a bloody cross and a resurrected body.  We are free from sin and alive to God.  We have a personal relationship with the Almighty Creator...all because of Jesus!  Praise God!  Hallelujah, all I have is Christ!

And we think on these glorious truths everyday...not just once a year...but all the more when given an opportunity to share it with any who might pause to listen.

So instead of worrying about when you're going to color your eggs, what you're going to wear for Easter Sunday, or how many peeps you can cram into your mouth at the same time, let's prepare our hearts to worship Christ and share His name with others.  Write the name of an unsaved friend, family member or coworker down on a sheet of paper and ask God to give you boldness for sharing the gospel with them in the next week (I didn't say invite them to our Easter service...although that's fine...).  Tell them about Jesus!  His name should flow out of the hearts and mouths of those who know and delight in Him.

Monday, February 28, 2011

shadows and dust

Psalm 42:1, 2
"As a deer pants for flowing streams,
so pants my soul for you, O God.
 My soul thirsts for God,
for the living God.
When shall I come and appear before God?"


God is my foundational need for all of life (both for my time here on earth and in all eternity), but do I live with this realization?  Do I live like I need God?  Or have I so confused my needs and desires that God just becomes another item to pack in my suitcase for the journey of life?

How easily I've become preoccupied with the delicacies this world tantalizingly offers me every waking hour!  I have tasted of this world's food.  For a moment it was sweet and filling, and then in a horrifying realization it turned to dust and made me sick.  And like a deranged dog I've found myself returning to my vomit, hoping that this time I'll at last find satisfaction.  And again I prove to myself that sin is insanity.

I don't think I'm alone in this struggle.

This world I'm passing through is the Shadowland, mere shadows of what is to come, and I am too easily seduced by its charms to recognize reality.  I snatch at its offers in order to please myself and become pathetically inebriated by vanity.

To think of my earthly desires as needs will no doubt get me into trouble here in the Shadowlands because I forget to look up.  The moment I believe that I have a need that can be fulfilled in anything but Christ I have given up my manhood.  I've committed suicide, and I am reduced to self-inflicted emotional flagellation.  The practical out-working of this poison is seen around every bend in my journey.  It's in my need to be loved, to be right, to be first, to be noticed, to be entertained, to be the exception, to be excused, to be...well, to be worshiped.  Any so-called "need" will torment my idolatrous heart.  I have starved my belly and ripped out my chest, grasping at everything and eating nothing.  It's not that I have eaten too little or too much, it is that I have eaten nothingness.  I live as an animal and nothing more.

Unless I dine in the High Countries.

It is then the shadows taste sweet as they point me to the Bread of Life, and in Him I find satisfaction.  I embody true manliness as I reflect the Imago Dei for I have realized who God has created me to be.  I worship the LORD.  I am satisfied in my Creator.  I delight in Christ.  My soul pants for God.  My soul thirsts for the living God.

I am eager to accept His invitation:


"Come, everyone who thirsts,
come to the waters;
and he who has no money, 
come, buy and eat!
Come, buy wine and milk
without money and without price.
Why do you spend your money for that which is not bread,
and your labor for that which does not satisfy?
Listen diligently to me, and eat what is good,
and delight yourselves in rich food."
Isaiah 55:1, 2

Sunday, July 11, 2010

the biggest year of our lives...and it's only july!

jolie sat content riding along in her brand new wagon as mommy pulled her along the street of our new neighborhood, judah could barely keep his eyes open (very typical!) as i cradled him in my arms, and carissa summed up life at the present with this statement: "2010 has been the biggest year of my life so far."

and that about says it all.

this has truly been an eventful year!  at the beginning of january our church moved into our new facility, and a few weeks later we lost our friend and pastor, kurt, very unexpectedly.  then we thought we were leaving for north carolina in february (with no job in sight), but our worship pastor resigned and we made the decision to stay and help for a few more months during the search process.  God then provided 2 jobs for us down in north carolina (leading worship at a small church and a shift supervisor position at starbucks).  then judah was born on june 4, and june 27 we said goodbye to our church family at rock point.

now we're embracing the adventure and this new chapter in our lives.  we left our little house on lincoln street in crawfordsville, indiana on june 30 driving the minivan as papa drove the rental truck filled with all our stuff.  and we arrived in wake forest, north carolina on july 1 to a welcoming group of friends from our new church ready to help us unpack the truck and provide us with a meal for the night (southern fried chicken...what a blessing!)  we enjoyed time with papa and dad sargent, and no sooner had they left then my parents arrived for a few days.  so we've had lots of help unpacking and setting up the new house (which carissa has already made feel like home)...and jolie's enjoyed all the attention from grandparents!  meanwhile, i started training at starbucks (which is a blast, but has felt a little like drinking from a fire hose), and this morning i led worship for the first time officially at our new church, union view baptist.  and in just a few weeks i'll begin my first classes in seminary.  whew...

what a blast!

following God's lead is so exciting.  ...crazy...but exciting!

and now i sit on a sunday afternoon and count all my amazing blessings...who are all sleeping soundly.  thank you, Jehovah-Jireh!

Monday, June 14, 2010

my little lion

ashamed it's taken me this long to post this exciting news, but i used all of last week to celebrate in relaxation (as much as possible)...but Judah is here!!!  he checked in right according to schedule on june 4 @ 2:00pm and weighed in @ 7lbs 8oz (and 20 and 1/2 inches long).  we went in for a scheduled c-section that friday which was sooo much easier (like it was really all that difficult for me!) than 26 hours of labor only to end up having a c-section (our experience with Jolie).  so the scheduled surgery was a nice, semi-relaxing change of pace...but i was still so pumped with adrenaline i probably brought comic relief to all the doctors and nurses around as i frantically paced back and forth waiting to be admitted to the operating room.  and in a matter of minutes upon arriving at the side of my heavily drugged wife...we heard his little cry.  well...it was more a scream...like a high-pitched screaming monkey...but it was wonderful!  and what a little miracle he is, and a huge answer to prayer!
he is a stud!  and he completely shocked us with his hair...a full head of dark brown hair...enough for a legit faux hawk (which he sported on his way home from the hospital!).  he's even got sideburns...trying to be like his daddy!  so much fun to hold him...he's so chill...just relaxed and peaceful...he's just awesome!  praise God!
just rereading this post makes me laugh...there's so much to say...but not the words to say it...

daddy's praising the LORD for you, Judah my scepter (Psalm 60:7)...my little lion!  i'm praying you become a mighty lion for the glory of God!

human doings or human beings?

this is a well-spoken and thoughtful reminder for those on the journey to become like Christ:

the pressure to accomplish snuffs out the pleasure of being God's child.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

rejoicing in God's provision!

it's time to just thank Jehovah-Jireh for how He has faithfully provided for us.  i went down on the weekend of may 23 to wake forest, north carolina to scope out the area in preparation of our big move.  well, really i went down to candidate at a small church in franklinton (just a few miles north of wake forest) for a worship pastor position.  but i also took advantage of the opportunity to see the campus of southeastern baptist theological seminary and our little duplex that we'll call home for the next short season of life.  and on top of that i also spent a few hours applying for jobs around the area.

to sum up the weekend...the church was amazing!  i loved the people, really enjoyed leading worship, felt like i got fed from God's Word, bonded with the pastors, and sensed God's leading the whole time.  i think it will be a great fit...a place where we can immediately plug in and start serving!  so we're excited about that opportunity!!

and then a HUGE added blessing were my interviews with starbucks.  i walked in on friday (fresh off the plane) just to see if i could talk to the manager.  we talked for just a couple minutes and she asked if i had applied for the shift manager position and how much customer experience i had.  well, i had to be honest that i had none (and so no, i did not apply for the shift manager position assuming that i would need the entry level position to get my feet wet), but i told her what i do as a pastor and how some of that could be transferrable.  so she called up another store manager and set up interviews for sat. and sun., telling me that by just talking to me she wanted to see if i would be a good fit for the shift manager position!  needless to say, on tuesday (back in indiana) i got the call from mitch (the other store manager) offering me the job!

i can't tell you how awesome that is....we've been praying for months and months for God's direction and provision...and in one weekend He took care of it all.  He is absolutely incredible!!

and now...the week we've been waiting for has arrived...

mom s. is here, our room is ready, carlee is coming tomorrow...and judah is due friday!!!  God is good...

book #9: the tombs of anak

this is just a little blast from the past, and i'm only slightly embarrassed to be including this book on my list...about as embarrassed as i was to read a children's book on a plane from north carolina.  but i couldn't help myself...i loved this book as a kid.  it's one of the few books that i vividly remember my dad reading to me before bed, and i remember the thrill of emotions it evoked as we sat in the dim light and entered into a world that (for a kid) was pretty scary.  so thank you, Frank Peretti...again!  it wasn't quite the same or terrifying reading it the second time (now that my taste buds have grown up...and having delved into the mind of ted dekker), but i have to admit it was thoroughly enjoyable!

think indiana jones who still goes to sunday school (...i'm proud of you if you picked up on the movie line reference)!  The Cooper Kids Adventure Series recounts the exploits of jay and lila cooper who tag along with their archeologist dad, dr. jake cooper, and The Tombs of Anak was certainly the most thrilling of the original 4 volumes included in this series.  dr. cooper is the equivalent of the spiritually steady, almost grandfatherly mr. whittaker (adventures in odyssey...another blast from the past) who lives on the edge and fears no evil...not even ancient tombs or the eerie songs that emanate from the surrounding darkness.  he's the well-studied, quick-thinking, wise and experienced seeker of knowledge who's ready to spring into action the moment danger threatens to strike (especially his kids).  so throw in the Biblically inspired ancient ruins of Gath, the mystery surrounding the tombs, the strange local hill-dwellers, and the disappearance of a crew member and you've got a fascinating thrill ride for kids (...ok, ok...and for me).

peretti tries to base this mystery around another mystery that's briefly detailed in the early books of the Bible: the descendants of anak.  while i'm sure there are great liberties taken with his interpretation (and never wanting to be the plot spoiler to a good thriller), i enjoyed the ties into some of the strange genealogical records of the Bible.  and the message of the the tombs of anak is really a strong warning against greed and the love of power...enough to scare the desire right out of ya!  and the more i read, the more i would caution parents.  peretti has no problem writing thrillers with a touch of horror, and death is dealt with right out in the open.  so you may want to preview this one to make sure your little one's ready to handle the suspense and the issues that may arise.

but it was fun to take a stroll down memory lane...and only a little tricky to hide the "kids series" label from the other passengers on the plane.

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

book #8: the screwtape letters


C.S. Lewis is simply too fascinating and fun to ignore.  i hardly qualify as an expert on the great author and apologist, but i have been delighted for years by his beautiful way of capturing deep thought in simple words and pictures.  he eloquently and masterfully places complex philosophical ideas on the bottom shelf where they are attainable, practical and easily transferable to everyday conversation without laboring the mind to the point of boredom.  and it's often his starting point that sets him apart from other theologians.

like asking the question, i wonder what the demons talk about amongst themselves?

so instead of a rigorous and academic work on spiritual warfare The Screwtape Letters offers a refreshing, observant, and at times, eerie look into the mystery of the supernatural world.  it's a unique and unspoken plot that you follow as one demon (screwtape) writes letters to his nephew demon (wormwood) who's out on assignment and seems to need advice (whether wormwood would ever admit it or not)...a fascinating concept.  but i'd have to agree with lewis that it's probably a good thing the book didn't go on any longer than it did.  it was startlingly insightful but began to feel oppressive as i (unfortunately all-too-easily) twisted my brain to think like the enemy.  here's how lewis described writing this work:

"though i had never written anything more easily, i never wrote with less enjoyment.  the ease came, no doubt, from the fact that the device of diabolical letters, once you have thought of it, exploits itself spontaneously...though it was easy to twist one's mind into the diabolical attitude, it was not fun, or not for long.  the strain produced a sort of spiritual cramp.  the work into which i had to project myself while spoke through Screwtape was all dust, grit, thirst, and itch.  every trace of beauty, freshness, and geniality had to be excluded.  it almost smothered me before i was done.  it would have smothered my readers if i had prolonged it."


there's also the caution to not place too much emphasis on the work of the devil.  as in all disciplines, the process of learning from screwtape comes in the balance.  don't neglect or underemphasize spiritual warfare, but do not swing to the opposite extreme and get carried away in demonic activity.

i would say the most enlightening aspect of this work was the frightening reminder of the subtle attack of the enemy.  "indeed the safest road to hell is the gradual one--the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts..."  and it has taught me to be all the more vigilant in renewing my mind in His Word (Eph. 4:22-24) and daily putting on the armor of God (Eph. 6:10-18) so that i can stand against the schemes of the devil.

the enemy is cunning.  but my God is greater!  and "His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of Him who called us to His own glory and excellence" (2 Pet. 1:3).

Thursday, May 13, 2010

a cigarette butt's a sweet sight!


no, i'm serious, it is!

walking out the doors of our church, i looked and saw a cigarette butt.  and it made me smile.  an assessment of the evidence seems to point to our celebrate recovery ministry that meets on tuesday nights, a ministry that incorporates scheduled "smoke breaks" as i understand it.

and i love it.

it means people are coming to lay their lives out for our church to see.  it means they're coming to hear the Truth.  it means their coming to Jesus.  and it means that He is working!

in fact, this sunday we're going to hear a testimony from a brother who's just become a believer...has kept his life clean from drugs for a couple months, heard the gospel through the CR ministry, trusted in Christ, invited everyone he could to come witness his baptism (in the creek in the pouring rain), has voraciously pursued getting involved at church, wants to grow, and is an incurably contagious follower of Christ!  love it!  (just heard this morning that his mom trusted in Christ for salvation last night!!)

so i hope we see many more cigarette butt's in front of our doors.

in fact, i'm gonna pray for it.  i don't want to butt against what God's doing!  Lord Jesus, keep drawing people to Yourself!

Monday, May 10, 2010

books #6 & 7: "the lost city of z" and "sherlock holmes and the hound of the baskervilles"

so, by the insistance of my wife i'm going to include The Lost City of Z in my list of 100 books by 2020...already reviewed it here.  i guess it's worth including...this reading list will most likely include a eclectic plethora of topics and genres....so why not!  now on to the next...



Sherlock Holmes and the Hound of the Baskervilles was an instant favorite of mine as a child...well, at least the illustrated classics for kids version was!


ah...the illustrated classics for kids!  i'm indebted to whoever decided to make all these classics available to young readers, because i believe they were instrumental in developing my love for reading as well as giving me a broad layout of the land of classical literature (to which i'll also credit the old PBS show: wishbone!)  i remember first reading this particular book on family vacation, nestled into my captains seat in the back of our minivan.  it was my first encounter with sherlock, a hero who has evidently never lost his intrigue in my mind.  
i'll admit that i most likely felt inspired to revisit this old story after watching the recent hollywood adaption of sherlock, but, although i still thoroughly enjoyed the movie, i had to admit they've strayed pretty far from sir conan doyle's actual character.  baskervilles reveals the little nuances that makes sherlock one of the most beloved heroes in classic literature, but it also focuses a great deal on his counterpart, dr. watson.  there is a large section of the book where the reader is to believe that sherlock is completely absent and therefore must depend on dr. watson's point of view and assessment of the facts and circumstances.
it was interesting to me to see how the solving of the mystery removed all semblance of the supernatural. what made this particular mystery so intriguing at the start (the supposed presence of a supernatural hound) was tidily resolved by the collection of facts that could easily be explained scientifically (this twist was also present in the latest movie).  i can't help but assume that this was rooted in modern thinking (that everything could be explained by scientific fact using the scientific method), which played a huge role in liberal theology (the dismissal of the supernatural...and particularly the resurrection...because of the insistence that the scientific method was capable of explaining all life and phenomena).  so i enjoyed the mystery and the resolution, but couldn't help feeling that it was meant to numb my belief in the existence of miracles and the supernatural.
then again...in reading The Lost City of Z, david grann linked col. percy fawcett to sir arthur conan doyle, and even suggested that conan doyle, along with fawcett, delved into the occult.  i have not studied the life of sir arthur conan doyle, but it would be interesting to see if he was truly inundated by modern thought or if he had an unusual fascination with the supernatural.

at any rate, if you're looking for a classic mystery thriller...look no further!  head over to your local library and pick up your copy of The Hound of the Baskervilles, and maybe you too will find a new hero!

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

"deekoo deesus"


i was filled with joy last night as we were preparing to put jolie to bed.  we've been trying to stay disciplined in reading from her Bible before all the other rituals that go into the nightly routine, and the time that we spend looking through the beginner's Bible from zondervan has been a huge blessing to me.  we have many picture Bibles to choose from, but this one has become my favorite because of the huge emphasis on Jesus...lots of stories and parables that allow us to talk about Him over and over as we seek to impress on our little girl how much mommy & daddy love Jesus.  i also really appreciate that this version does not shy away from the cross, but handles it tastefully and allows us the opportunity to begin teaching our soon-to-be 2 year old the gospel!
so last night, she immediately started saying "deesus", as she handed me her Bible and crawled up on the couch to listen intently.  then we typically spend some time looking at pictures of pharaoh in the OT (due to her fascination with the song, "pharaoh, pharaoh...", to which she's also picking up the motions), and then we hit the NT and "deesus" is everywhere!  almost immediately after the manger she started saying, "coss"...which thrilled my heart to see her remembering, getting caught up in the drama, and wanting to read the account of his death on the cross as we moved joyfully into the resurrection!
then for the first time last night...jolie prayed!
we always pray together as a family before meals and before bed, and we've asked her on multiple occasions if she would like to pray, but she's always refused and differed to mommy or daddy.  but last night, after reading through the account of the Jesus' life and excitedly talking about Him, she willingly repeated a simple prayer.
"deekoo deesus"
(thank you Jesus)
that was it.  she didn't even finish with "amen" (which she often injects in the middle of daddy's lengthier prayers).  it was simple.  and yes, we spoon fed her the phrase.  but it was beautiful.  and it filled my heart with joy!
Lord, instill a love for Christ in the heart of my little girl.  Raise her up to know and love you, and use her for your glory!

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

my brain won't shut off

so much going through my heart and mind today:
1. i need a heart that is passionate for the lost.  i'm ashamed that i think of myself as so spiritually mature, and yet this simple, absolutely necessary characteristic is inexcusably missing from my life.  Lord, give me a passion for the lost!  Give me courage to intentionally be with those who don't know You, and share gospel!
2. i never want to get past the gospel.  again, i'm ashamed that my prideful self-righteousness has regularly ignored facing and rejoicing in the profoundly simple truth that i am a sinner in need of a Savior and that Savior is Jesus.  i know that i can never lose my salvation, and justification was an instantaneous, once-for-all moment...but i'm as much in need of God's grace today in my life as i was the moment i was saved.
3. i need to be assertive in finding an accountability bro in NC.  he needs to know where i've been, where i need to be, where i don't need to be, and where i am.  i need him.
4. we're praying that God would give us life-long friends to meet, grow with, and enjoy down in wake forest...friends that are passionately in love with Christ who will push us in our walk and encourage us in ministry
5. i'm praying for a job that i can enjoy that will allow me to enjoy time with my family
6. thinking about what the focus of my passion and ministry is...i believe i can sum it up like this: i want to teach guys God's Word.


i suppose being the verbal processor that i am i really need to sit down and talk to someone about all this stuff that's rumbling through my heart and mind.  but i just wanted to get some of this down in writing for my own benefit later.  and pray for my wife's patience as i process.  Lord, thank you for a loving, respectful, understanding, and patient wife!

book #5: it


i hate being that guy.

you know the guy i'm talking about?  he's the one you're always warned about: don't be that guy!  it usually hits you when you're listening to someone talk about him or write about him, saying things like, don't be the guy that does this or does that...  and for me, i'm usually self-righteous enough to think, yeah, i can't believe that guy!  i'm glad i'm not like him!  he just doesn't get it.  that guy's always messing it up!  and often i'll even stoop to the pharisaical (albeit subconscious) prayer, Lord, thanks for helping me not be that guy!  i don't ever want to be that guy!


well, i have a confession to make...the book it kicked my butt.  and it kicked it over and over again.  and i have another confession to make...i started this book with a very critical spirit.  it sounded like another over-simplistic, theologically-watered-down, results-driven, hyped-up leadership formula guaranteed to bring success to those ministries willing to bow at the feet of the corporate model rather than the Word of God.  i'm ashamed at my prideful, self-righteous heart.

now, back to my original confession.  the more i read the more i couldn't escape it: i was that guy.

almost every chapter in part 2, "what contributes to it?", revealed my personal lack of it.  the more i read the worse it got.  it seemed like every few pages craig groeschel would give an example of that guy or ministry that didn't have it or had lost it...and it was like i was looking in a mirror.

if i'm willing to be honest i have to admit that i struggle to:
see it clearly
know where it is not
enjoy it with others
be courageous enough to do anything for it
fail towards it
want others to have it
and share it


and so what reads like a simple ministry leadership or Christian living book has profoundly impacted me personally.  i hope.  and i'm thankful for it.  so i purpose to make it my prayer, as he suggests, for God to:
stretch me.
ruin me.
heal me.

and i highly recommend it.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

book #4: disciplines of a godly man


"it is an immutable fact that we will never get anywhere in life without discipline - especially in spiritual matters...none of us can claim an innate spiritual advantage. none of us are inherently righteous, none of us naturally seek God or are reflexively good.  therefore, as children of grace, our spiritual discipline is everything


no discipline, no discipleship!
no sweat, no sainthood!
no perspiration, no inspiration!
no pain, no gain!
no manliness, no maturity!" (p.224)

this comprehensive look at spiritual disciplines is definitely a must read for any guy that's serious about being sold out for Christ!  i will confess that it's taken me a while to finish the whole thing because i read a chapter a week (for the most part) for a weekly book study with some coaches at north montgomery high school...and i just today went back and finished the 4 chapters that i had missed.  but i purpose to come back and revisit this book in the future, because it is packed full of in-your-face, Biblical insight into how to truly become a God-honoring man.  i was first impressed by kent hughes' commentary on the book of ephesians, and this book has since sold me on his style of expositional teaching.  although each chapter dealt with a specific topic of discipline, he would most often simply exegete a passage of Scripture or a narrative from the Bible to pull out the Biblical principles that informs men of how God wants us to live specific to each facet of discipline.  each chapter carried a powerful message that was Biblically sound, insightful, practical, prophetic and urgent!

it covers the disciplines of: purity, marriage, fatherhood, friendship, mind, devotion, prayer, worship, integrity, tongue, work, church, leadership, giving, witness and ministry.  and the resources at the end of the book also include helpful tools that aid in the practical outworking of many of these disciplines.

this book will remain a constant tool in my development as a man of God and my ministry to others in search of living disciplined, Christ-honoring lives!  anyone needing and wanting help to become a man of God needs to read this book!

book #3: Thr3e


ironic.

book #3 on my 100 books to read by 2020 list (not including The Lost City of Z which my wife seems to think belongs on the list) is entitled Thr3e by Ted Dekker.

now let me just say that i have to work hard NOT to rely on fiction for my reading diet.  there's not often as much benefit in my mind as there is in engaging with authors thoughts unaided by story.  story can be a powerful tool however, and some of my favorite books are fictional (Safely Home by Randy Alcorn and Narnia for example).  i try my best to keep my reading list loaded with non-fictional works from authors that have proven to stimulate Christian thought and provide theological insight.  with that said, i also enjoy a few novels and thrillers just to make sure reading stays fun for me, and there is always something to learn...

[let this serve as a potential spoiler alert]
dekker is an interesting author.  this is only the second book i've read by him (the first being Skin), but both have been page-turners: fascinating stories with truly unforeseeable plot-twists that delve into mystery with a touch of horror...oh and he tries to make them theological.  that's where i kind of balk at his writing.  it is "christian".  but i can't say i'm thrilled with the theology he propounds.  Thr3e enters into the classic arena between good and evil, but it seems that dekker is ready to suggest a trichotomy where the real YOU is caught between the good YOU and the evil YOU almost as if the first YOU is an innocent bystander that simply has to make a choice between the other 2 (reminiscent of the depiction of a man with shoulder angels).  in fact, no where in this story is there drawn the distinction between the sin nature and the NEW nature of Spirit-indwelled believers.  it can be assumed from this book that ALL men are caught within this trichotomy he portrays through the main character.  and then there is no mention of the power of Christ that enables believers (when they yield to the Holy Spirit) to have victory over sin and defeat our sin nature (through the put off/put principle according to Eph. 4:22-24)...so he misses an opportunity to remind believers of the true power that is available to us in conquering sin.  i will say that he does a good job in some ways of portraying our propensity to sin and reminding us that all sin is just that: sin.  there is no hierarchy of sin (although there may be more consequences for some sins than others).

ultimately i am left with a fascinating story that kept me on the edge of my seat, but it comes up short in truly edifying my heart and mind with the Truth from the Word of God.

Friday, April 9, 2010

the heavens declare the glory of God

pure doxology is not only impacted by theology, it has no source but theology.  and as i've been compiling a referenced summary outline for our systematic theology course we're developing at church, song has been welling up inside me ready to burst out spontaneously and praise the greatness of our God.  of course, it takes communion with the LORD before that song takes flight.  and it came this morning as simply and quietly as that old chorus,

i love You, Lord
and i lift my voice
to worship You,
O my soul, rejoice!
take joy, my King
in what You hear
may it be a sweet, sweet sound
in Your ear.


yet even in that moment of contemplative praise i am humbled by the reality of my distracted heart.  oh, to fear the LORD and worship Him whole-heartedly, it is beyond my nature's ability.  only by the power of His Spirit living in me can i sincerely cry, i love You, Lord!


been thinking also of the role creation plays in revealing the majesty of God.  psalm 19:1-2 says, the heavens declare the glory of God, and the sky above proclaims His handiwork.  day to day pours out speech, and night to night reveals knowledge.  to those of us who see God, we see and appreciate the beauty of His creation.  but do we really appreciate science and the role that it plays in discovering the world around us which can aid our doxology?  or is science the enemy of Truth?
unfortunately it seems that science has often been pitted against religion, often because religion has felt threatened (not by science's discoveries but by scientists' interpretations of those discoveries...it's important to distinguish between the arguments and the true source of the arguments). and even more unfortunately, religion at times historically has acted on that sense of threat with brutal retaliation.  this is not general or universal as some would have us believe (*cough...dan brown...*cough), but their have been incidents that have developed this stereotype and led trigger-happy religious figures and scientists to furiously load their intellectual weapons and stand twitching at any sudden movement the other makes.  as a result it is often the tactic of secular scientists to discredit faith as a crutch for those not willing to face facts, and for religious leaders to either water down doctrine to fit current trends in popular thinking or to dismiss scientific discoveries as malicious hoaxes from atheistic attackers of faith.  (disclaimer: i am only making personal observations from the lay of the land as i see the battle rage between science and religion).
what saddens me though is why the Church is so hesitant to reconcile what we know to be general revelation (romans 1:19-20) with special revelation (2 tim. 3:16-17; deut. 29:29; john 1:14).  it seems to me that many church leaders even in the evangelical (and by that i mean those who truly hold to sola Scriptura and sola fide) and conservative circles that i run in shy away from general revelation all together, almost as if we're afraid of what we'll find there.  it seems there is a growing fear that if we truly peer into the natural world with the scientific method we (those of us who by faith believe in God and the authority of His Word) will not like what we see.  when nothing could be further from the Truth!

the heavens declare the glory of God.  it's as if we read that, but don't truly believe it.  is it a true statement?  a resounding and solidly reasonable, YES!!!

romans 1 makes it especially clear that "natural revelation yields a natural theology or a natural knowledge of God.  God's wrath is present, not because men fail to receive his natural revelation, but because, after receiving this knowledge, mankind fails to act appropriately.  they refuse to honor God or be grateful to him.  they suppress the truth of God" (What is Reformed Theology, R.C. Sproul, p.15).  romans 1:29 says that they literally "did not see fit to acknowledge God."  it is a choice men make to suppress the truth that has been revealed, and whether they will acknowledge it or not, it is true revelation that leaves them without excuse.
it's helpful for me to think about it in terms of 1st and 2nd things (a main concept in C.S. Lewis' writings).  when you put 1st things (God) first, you can then undersand and appreciate 2nd things (in this case, nature and man).  but when you put 2nd things first, you miss them both entirely.
those that claim an interpretation of scientific facts as the evidence against believing in God are not making discoveries that disprove Him, they are making a choice to reject Him.

it is not that they don't see nature, it is that they cannot hear what it is screaming to them!  and because we have been given divine revelation in the form of His Word we can clearly hear and appreciate the message that creation is singing.  and i'll add that we (as those who hold forth the Word of Life) have the responsibility to pass on a love for general revelation (His creation) and a hunger to explore the Brilliance it points to.  don't miss the message: the heavens declare the glory of God!!!

Saturday, April 3, 2010

not one of the 100...


finally finished another book i'd been working on for awhile.  i had too many going on at the same time, and this one had to take a backseat to other priorities.  in fact, i don't even think i can include this in my list of 100 books i'll read by 2020...only because that goal really developed around the idea of being encouraged, challenged, and stimulated in my walk with Christ.  this was not really as directly linked to that goal as much as it was a subject of interest.
The Lost City of Z is a journalist's adventure to uncover the truth behind the mysterious disappearance of colonel percy harrison fawcett in 1925.  fawcett was an explorer who eventually became obsessed with the dream of discovering the city of el dorado (which he referred to simply as "z") deep in the heart of the amazon jungle.  david grann has done a masterful job of compiling the facts surrounding the lore and legend of both the mythical city of el dorado and the famous mystery that is percy fawcett's last expedition. the book is a compelling blend of investigative journalism, biography, history, anthropology, sociology, and at times it reads like a mystery novel.  a fascinating read if you feel like exploring the wild jungles (which then were merely blank spots on a map), escaping hostile tribesmen, persevering through the attacks of hordes of deadly insects, uncovering ancient artifacts, and pursuing the illusive mystery of el dorado.  it also provides interesting commentary on life, society, science and morals in the early twentieth century for all those history lovers.
it also looks like it's set to become a movie in 2012...should be interesting to see how they transform and adept this material to the silver-screen.